did you hear how t.o.’s texts kept tony romas from overdosing on painkillers?

January 31, 2007 at 2:51 am | Posted in brian, fespn, football (american), tennis | 3 Comments

revisiting my predictions:

all the americans made early exits except for serena. but i wanted her to win. and the saints did lose, but it’s because i forgot what channeling zidane’s headbutting spirit would lead to. zidane headbutted that guy in the world cup because he didn’t know what was going on. he was on a billion painkillers (from his injury earlier in the game) and suffered from heat exhaustion. he headbutted on pure adrenalin, much the way the saints tried to play the nfc championship. zidane lost the world cup and the saints lost to the bears. it wasn’t that my prediction was wrong, it was just that i didn’t follow my own logic far enough. maybe i’m not a sports-predicting savant. that’s fine with me.

moving on:

here’s what i don’t get, the football season is over and everyone at espn can’t stop talking about how much they hate t.o. what’s the deal? nearly all the personalities over at espn are acting more like estranged lovers than football analysts when it comes to t.o. related stories. i understand that t.o. is a total hunk. just look at him when he’s doing sit-ups shirtless in his driveway. i also understand that having a lasting, meaningful relationship with t.o. must be difficult with his fragile self-esteem and depression problems. at least that’s what i’ve been told about myself since i also have depression problems which negatively impacts my self-esteem. so i think i get: those espn personalities want so badly to be with t.o. but it just too difficult with t.o.’s emotional problems. plus those espn personalities have t.o.-like egos. so the whole thing end in a messy break-up and bitterness. but come on, can you really hate on a guy this much simply because he stopped returning your text messages? let me give you a hint sean s, jaws, stuart scott, skip bayless and the rest of you, if you want to have t.o. return your text messages try seeming less desperate in your texts. and don’t text him sideways smiley faces. try this: “hey bro. congrats on a stellar season. next year you’ll win mvp and mvp of the super bowl. sorry about all those things i said about you on the air. i was pressured by the higher ups to really be ruthless. and i was hurt. if i’ve been unkind, i hope you can let it slide. much love.”


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  1. But that text message would take like, at least three different messages and maybe they can’t afford much more than 100 a month. I mean, I’m not on their side…I’m not taking sides here. I’m just saying… and smiley faces just embody so much.

  2. embody so much disrespect, you mean.

  3. then just shoot him an email. or blackberry him. i’m sure all those guys have bedazzled blackberrys.

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