i’m glad i take drugs, as a doctor and a father

October 25, 2007 at 9:19 am | Posted in baseball, brian | 1 Comment

i hope beckett gets nailed tonight too.  well, that depends on what getting nailed is a euphemism for.  i’m actually watching the game right now.  i think the rockies twelve year-old pitcher is the one getting nailed right now.  and what’s up with all the awful facial hair?  but back to beckett:  fight describes beckett as a bad-ass.  i think i agree with that description, provided fight and i have the same definition of bad-ass.  maybe we should make the definition of bad-ass be beckett.  so from now on if i call someone a bad-ass it’s because (s)he reminds me of beckett (who i think is an idiot, i mean, what’s up with those stupid necklaces?).

but mostly i’m not paying attention to this game.  i think the red sox have already scored a dozen times and i can only remember the opening homerun.  i have noticed a lot of bank commercials.  and chevy commercials.  and anti-steriod commercials.  and i noticed the opening song: john williams conducting the boston philharmonic in some version of america arranged specifically for this world series.

have you noticed how sometimes fox transitions between live game footage and replays with this moving transformer graphic?

i think this game’s going to be rained out.  i also think beckett is addicted to painkillers, just like vince vaughn.   do you think he trims his beard himself?  who pays more for haircuts, beckett or john edwards?  (jokes about john edwards’ haircut?  what is it, like seven months ago?)  but seven strikeouts in the fourth, that’s pretty good.

i don’t get this taco bell commercial.  rules for single men to live by?  devo?  i also don’t understand these iphone commercials.  the stories are bullshit and they obviously using actors.

the ramones “i wanna be sedated” brought us back to the game.

fenway park is, according to the guy who’s not joe buck, a national treasure.  i also learned that it’s only been in the last few years that fans have been able to sit on the green monster.  i maybe agree with the guy who called fenway a national treasure provided that we have the same definition of a national treasure.  fenway is easily the best ballpark ever.  but it moslty makes me sad.  i imagine there was this architect who one day came up with this idea for a baseball field.  “we’ll have the left-field wall be 100 feet tall!” he said.  everyone laughed at him, but his dream came true.  but you have to remember that for every success story like this, there were at least 100 other architects who had just as awesome ideas for baseball parks who never saw their dreams fulfilled and died peniless and alone.

rookie of the year: “jeepers, i wish i could tell these guys that my arm healed and i’m back to normal.”

i think joe buck really misses troy aikman.   joe buck’s a regular sportscasting renaissance man: he does football and baseball and maybe some other sports.  everytime you hear joe buck away from his football commentating partner, troy aikman, you can just feel the pain of separation.  joe buck is a professional, so he brings it every night, but there’s nothing like the way him and troy stare at each other.  true love.

1 Comment »

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  1. s.o.c. nice.
    i think beckett is a badass. He looks like this dude i used to know that called sexy women “filthy.”
    When buck was stalking aikman in the stands, that was really poignant.

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