fuck yeah!

November 7, 2008 at 11:30 am | Posted in college football, fight | 2 Comments

UTAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(fuck the mountain west and their stupid tv deal. that game

should’ve been one everyones tv. it was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

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sports!

September 3, 2008 at 3:04 am | Posted in blood, college football, fight, murder, tennis, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

if you didn’t get a great big sports boner (girls included) this weekend then you missed out on pure pleasure. the spanish karate kid (nadal) wasted everybody in tennis. and tennis was awesome. somehow i don’t think the us open will have as much of an emotional effect on me as wimbledon did (it was probably the most fulfilling emotional experience of my life) but you never know. it’s amazing that there are actually some american men in the next round. which is good because that means they’ll show mens tennis over the williams sisters. i was getting tired of watching women play (sorry), except that there are some major babes this year. remember the final is next sunday. moving on to college football. the university of utah is awesome! they beat michigan. michigan! in michigan. awesome. i noticed the nationally televised game had a lot of praise for utah. it seems utah and byu will probably be the best non major conference teams this year, which may mean nothing. but it could mean…something. and their (hopefully) perfect seasons up until they meet at the end of the season will be memorable. maybe. seems like they both play some weak teams. and now the best part about sports….DVRs! that’s right. and HD. wow. sports look so cool. and i am writing about it. oh:


“stop copying us.” i hate that i put a commercial on here. but i told brian i would blog about it. kill me.

here’s a letter we wrote to carlos boozer

May 19, 2007 at 12:12 am | Posted in basketball, brian, fight | 15 Comments

dear mr boozer,

congratulations on an impressive regular season and your phenomenal performances in this year’s playoffs. truly, this is a breakout year for you. with your range on your jump shot, your finesse in the post, your amazing two-handed ability and your rebounding, you obviously have the talent and the determination to be a superstar in today’s nba; however, talent and determination alone cannot elevate you to the level of superstardom in the post-jordan nba.

today’s super-stars must have a marketable persona. jordan’s mars blackman , lbj’s the lebron’s and larry johnson’s grandmama all serve as great examples of basketball players crafting personas that catpulted them from basketball star to sport’s superstar. we believe you need a similar persona to truly become a superstar.

with that in mind, we have the perfect idea for you:

slambidunktrous

this name obviously grows out of your two-handed ability around the hoop and your power. but it’s not just a name; it’s an identity. first you need to tattoo slam-dunk across your fingers night of the hunter style.

then after every slam-dunk you show your fists to the closest camera, prominently displaying your slam-dunk tattoo, and say “slam-dunk!” after that, the commercial offers come pouring in. and with your new identity, the commercial options are endless. for example, you’re all decked out like radio from do the right thing (complete with a boombox) and you’re like, “this is the story of slam and dunk.”

we could even make the commercials for you. as you can see, we’re full of great ideas. our commercials would be self-conscious, a bit self-deprecating and, of course, funny. if you aren’t comfortable with us doing the commercials, will be happy to give you this nickname for the nominal fee of 1 million dollars. when you think of all the endorsement opportunities such a name will provide for you, 1 million dollars is a steal.

love,

brian and fight

i heart andy roddick’s tennis heart and regular heart

September 25, 2006 at 12:34 pm | Posted in fight, tennis | 4 Comments


I know i know there has been way (way) too many Andy Roddick posts lately. But it’s because he’s been in the news dude. I watched Andy play tennis for nearly 5 hours yesterday. Oh okay i switched back and forth between other shit on my fight tv and went to a women’s soccer match and i got some sun to. The soccer match was good. The weird thing about the Davis Cup is that in the 5th set they don’t do a tie break, so you gotta win by 2 games. The record for the longest 5th set match at Davis Cup was set yesterday. Suck on it Sampras. Tursunof, Roddick’s opponent finally finished him off 17 games to 15. Andy sure does have a lot of tennis heart even though he let down the USA squad, but not the country because we could care less about tennis (and soccer). I have a hard time with the Davis Cup because i don’t really care. I like clay, i really do. I thought long about how hard it must be playing on clay. I imagine it’s probably a lot like playing tennis on drugs or alcohol. The ball is always bouncing weird, not doing what it’s supposed to. I encourage playing tennis on drugs and alcohol, at least until you’ve decided to take it serious. Now i’m off to watch some more fight tv…

Baseball Cards Are Worth More Than You Think

April 7, 2006 at 4:15 pm | Posted in baseball, fight | 4 Comments

I decided to do some investigative reporting on baseball cards. Why do I get the feeling baseball cards are the only reason baseball became a National treasure. EBay, April 6, 2006. I searched ‘baseball card’ I changed the price to list the highest amount first and on top with 31 bids “1914 Cracker Jack CHRISTY MATHEWSON #88” at Thirty-One Thousand Dollars. I, as a young lad, was a brainwashed child with high hopes of hitting the big money with a rare find baseball card. I wasted hundreds of my hard earned paper route money to buy one pack after another for what? I was born in 1979 and started collecting cards when I was 9, making it 1988, the highest bid on EBay ‘baseball card 1988’ is $51, with One bid. So you can see my disappointment since all my cards can’t be worth $51 a piece. Baseball ripped me off. I strongly believe that baseball cards sold that sport. Think about it, back before they televised games people were buying/trading/selling cards. You could even go as far to say that George Lucas is not a genius, he just stole his merchandising ideas for Star Wars from baseball. Baseball is only popular because of merchandising. Baseball is stupid. Baseball is dumb. Baseball is not fun.

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